Poligami di Malaysia. Bahagiakah wanita?

سْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

In the name of God, the Most Loving, the Most Merciful

Sayang sekali video di bawah di buat oleh SIS yg mendapat tajaan oleh barat . Di mana ayah2 , anak2 lelaki, dan mahram2 wanita memperjuangkan nasib mahram perempuan mereka yg terhimpit dalam poligami yang tidak adil?

Bertandu / mengarak pengantin

سْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

In the name of God, the Most Loving, the Most Merciful

Bertandu diamalkan oleh perkahwinan Arab, Cina, India, Melayu dan banyak bangsa lain. Melayu juga bertandu untuk raja dan berkhatan.Sesetengah negeri panggil ini adat menjulang. Mari kita tengok bagaimana pengantin diraikan di seluruh dunia.

Arab Moroko. Tandu ni dibuat di India.  Isiya biasanya boleh muat pengantin pompuan je. Pengantin lelaki biasanya kena naik kuda. Tapi kuda Arab ni banyak di ambil bakanya oleh orang Eropah utk dikacukkan dengan kuda diorg. Camana sy tau? Suami sy Swedish -Jepun. Kalau nak import dari India, korang type je morocan wedding carriage kat google. Sanggar Masri , sebuah butik perkahwinan, ada menyediakan perkhidmatan bertandu ni.

Tapi kalau korang rasa tak de orang nak angkat korang suami isteri, mungkin boleh tiru yg Cinderella carriage ni. Tak semestinya mesti di tarik oleh kuda. Boleh juga ditarik oleh lembu.
Kalau nak sewa perkhidmatan kereta kuda boleh klik link ni

Kalau nak suruh orang buat, pembuat kereta kuda dari Kuala Terengganu , Mohd Zahari Ismail, boleh tempah dari dia.  Gambar di bawah ni di ambil dari sini 

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Why muslim women cannot marry non-muslim men

سْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

In the name of God, the Most Loving, the Most Merciful

We muslims know that muslim women cannot marry non-muslim men. I used to think if he would convert, then that should be enough right?

Below are several things you need to consider 
1) If he converts to Islam only to marry a muslim woman, will he still continue with his previous habit such as drinking. Can you reach an agreement with him that every time he drinks, he will leave the house, he will never be too drunk that he will beat you and can you avoid your children  from seeing their father drinking alcohol?

2) If you tell your children to pray , to wash their private part after they answer the call of nature, or for many other islamic rules and they refuse, are you sure your husband will not defend your children instead of you?

3) If you tell your children not to go out on a date except accompanied with friends or relatives or be alone in a closed room with a non-relative males, will your husband agree with it since it might be part of his culture and thus he does not see any danger in it that the daughter might end up in a prostitution ring?

4) Will he have a problem with you or your daughter wearing the headscarf?

5) If you tell your children not to shake hands or hug the opposite gender because sometimes it can bring temptation , will your husband agree with it?

6) He might not be against Islam but his friends and relatives might call you terrorist when they have the chance.

7) Because non-muslim men can get sex free of charge without marriage and dump their girlfriend without protection from the court, why should they pay dowry to be in a marriage? pay compensation if they divorce? and be burdened with all of the responsibility of Islamic marriage ?

8) If there is a divorce in Islamic marriage a man is responsible 100% for providing the financial aspect of the children. While in many non-muslim countries this responsibility is shared 50/50. Do you think you have the money to provide for your children even 50%? Even if there is no divorce you simply must share 50/50 for your rent , your food and your children no matter how low your salary is. If you don't want to work to focus on your babies, you just have to accept the humiliation of not able to provide for yourself even though you are already 40.

9) If he decides Islam is not for him, or does not agree with you telling the child not to play  around with girls/boys, and divorce you, you already wasted more than 10 years of your life with him. A woman is only attractive before menopause and majority of men  prefer a 22 year old lady than a 42 year old divorcee. While for a man they only need to have a lot of money to get a lady, a woman have it a lot tougher to find another partner as she gets older.

Then again my husband is a Muslim convert. He is interested to learn about Islam. So do istikharah prayer and may Allah protect you if you wish to enter into this kind of marriage.

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Benarkah Melayu bangsa bersopan santun

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Sanggul Lintang vs tiara

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Dengan nama Tuhan yang Maha Pengasih, Maha Penyayang
In the name of God, the Most Loving, the Most Merciful

Jikalau kita lihat di kebanyakan perkahwinan Melayu di Semenanjung Malaysia dan Sarawak, kita nampak pemakaian pengantin perempuan lebih banyak diambil dari budaya asing sehingga kelihatan seolah2 Melayu tidak mempunyai budayanya sendiri.

 Ini terjadi kepada wanita Melayu Semenanjung Malaysia  ( Minangkabau , Bugis, Mandailing, Melanau, Jawa) dan Melayu Sarawak sehingga kita tidak dapat mengenalpasti pengantin2 wanita ini dari bangsa apa. Ini kerana wanita melayu sangat suka mengenakan tiara dari sanggul lintang dengan alasan bertudung ataupun berat.  Apakah wanita melayu begini berkira dalam mengamalkan budaya sendiri? Cuba bayangkan jika lelaki memakai topi koboi menggantikan tanjak. Bukankah pelik rupanya?

 

Tiada dokoh, tiada sanggul lintang, tiada songket, tidak kelihatan walaupun segaris budaya melayu. Ini belum masuk budaya potong kek

Contohi orang Bajau yang sangat teliti dan kuat mengamalkan adat . Tudung tidak menghalang pengantin perempuan dari mengenakan serimpak (mahkota Bajau)

Tidak salah untuk mengenakan tiara untuk berhias depan suami sehari2an. Tidak salah juga mengambil dan mengubah suai serba sedikit budaya asing tetapi pada masa yang sama masih mengekalkan  budaya sendiri seperti pengantin Negeri 9 dibawah ini. Kita masih kenal ini budaya Minang kerana seni sulam mereka yang unik, dokoh dan sanggul lintang bulat

 Klik di sini kalau mahu menempah sanggul lintang khas untuk anda .

Pengantin wanita ini pula menggabungkan baju minang, dan kaftan morocco serta sanggul lintang bertatahkan Swarovski . Tetapi mereka masih menggunakan budaya melayu / minang iaitu  sanggul lintang, songket , alas dada dan ukiran kayu.

 Tidak salah juga kalau kita mahu mengambil inspirasi dari kereta bertandu orang morocco dan masih mengekalkan seni melayu sepeti joget diambil dari tarian portuguese,branyo, tetapi penarinya memakai baju melayu

Juga kalau pengantin perempuan malu bersanding atau bepurdah kalian boleh memakai "veil"sambil digabungkan dengan sanggul lintang atau gabungkan juga dengan rantai didepan muka seperti pengantin Melayu-Betawi Indonesia/ Melayu Sarawak

Ini pula gambar pengantin Singapura. Walaupun mereka minoriti di sana dan lebih suka  berbahasa Inggeris dari Bahasa Melayu , mereka masih lagi mengekalkan budaya kahwin Melayu walaupun bertudung.

  Gambar pengantin bertudung dan masih bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Hambali

   Gambar pengantin  bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Hambali

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   Gambar pengantin bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Hambali

  Gambar pengantin bertudung dan masih bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Hambali

   Gambar pengantin bertudung dan masih bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Rozi Klaseboer

Gambar pengantin bertudung dan masih bersanggul lintang di ambil dari Facebook Melayu Spura: Versari Ade

Video dibawah ini antara perkahwinan Minangkabau Malaysia yang sangat2 jarang dibuat oleh orang Minang Malaysia yang masih mengikut tradisi .
Tetapi malangnya walaupun di hari perkahwinan Melayu tidak mahu memelihara budaya di negara sendiri.

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Indonesian Malay Palembang Dance / Tarian Melayu Palembang ( Tarian Pagar)

This is an Indonesian Malay Palembang dance performed during wedding ceremony to mark the end of the bride's single life. The dance is called Tarian Pagar

Below is another Malay Palembang dance which was performed during ancient Srivijaya kings rule. They were known to be friendly and would perform this dance for their guests. This dance is called Tarian Gending

Below is a picture of Palembang traditional dress. The fabric used is called songket and used to be worn only for the royals which used to be made from real gold thread.

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